Okay, so yeah, I’m single now. Not really the story I was planning on telling at 36, but here we are! I can’t pretend that divorce isn’t self esteem-shattering — but two years after the fact, I’m feeling kinda amazing. My mom always told me she felt her sexiest in her 30s, and she aint wrong. This’ll sound bizarre, but when I was younger, I was ashamed to be pretty because girls were so mean about it. Growing up, my sister Brownie was always on standby, waiting to beat someone up for wanting to beat me up for “thinking I was cute” (nothing cute about having a 10-year-old bodyguard when you’re 13). Even in my twenties, I’d be afraid to dress too sexy or be too flirtatious, lest anyone think I thought I was feeling myself. Self-conscious like a motha. But suddenly, like six months ago, I woke up and I was in a Whitesnake video. Seriously, it all turned around. When the rug is pulled out from under you and you’re forced to reinvent your life, either you crumble from the pressure…or you transform yourself into your biggest fan and kick ass. Sink or swim. It’s crazy, I flirt with everything that moves — coat check boys, middle age hipster dads in the diaper aisle, dapper gays at industry parties. Just ’cause it feels good! I’m sparkly, I’m hair choreography, I’m animal print, grrr!
Unless the guy is too hot. I’m loathe to admit it, but I tend to lose bit of personality in the face of supernatural sexiness (one day I’ll tell you my mortifying Idris Elba story). But you know what? Lipstick helps. Bright lipstick. Its instant color confidence. If your lips are vivid enough, they can be makeup equivalent of vampires “glamouring” their victims. The tomato red or fuschia-purple hypnotizes the guy a little bit, knocking him off his perfection pedestal. While he’s fixated on your lips, you have a sec to pull yourself together and reset the dazzle button (yeah, I just said ‘reset the dazzle button’)! I have three going-out lipsticks I keep on standby:
Thanks to Kourtney K. and Solange, tangerine dream lips have been the thing for like a year now. My favorite ever is YSL Rouge Volupte Pearl in Incandescent Orange ($34), a creamsicle-colored, vaguely shimmery shade that somehow makes me look tan, despite my mid-winter washout.
Brand new from MAC’s Spring 2012 “Shop MAC Cook MAC” collection, Quick Sizzle is a mad bright fuschia that’s only appropriate when you’re feeling extra slinky and bold (or trying to get there). At any other time, it’s a little too “David LaChapelle shoot.”
Honestly, Napoleon Perdis Devine Goddess Lipstick in Aphrodite ($24) is the red to end all reds. Creamy, moisturizing and so highly pigmented it’s still badass, three cocktails later.
Dying to know your favorite sexytime lipsticks!