So my girlfriend Tricia Lee (of Polish Bar, the fanciest nail salon in Brooklyn), has invited a bunch of friends down to Jamaica for her birthday — for four sun-drenched days. And. I. Am. Hype. I’ve spent the past two weeks re-digging my car out of the snow, like, every other day. It’s horrible.
Me, to person carrying a shovel: Sir, can you help me?
Person: I’m a woman.
It’s always something. The next day, I begged a beautiful older Jamaican fellow to help me.
Jamaican: I would, but you are not nice. One time I offered fe guide you out of your spot because you were ’bout fe hit my car, and you ignored me. I see you coming outcha house looking stressed and worried, and you don’t even say hi. This is bad for your energy.
Me: Sir, I’m usually in pain and just trying to get from point A. to point B., and I don’t even remember what you’re…”
Jamaican: See? You doan remembah, gyal! I will help you, because I’m neighborly. But first, let’s rap about self-soothing your emotions.
So we sat in my car, he counseled me, got my entire life together, and I cried. Because he was secretly, like, the Dalai Lama, or something. Then he shoveled out my car. These snowstorms are fucking with my emotions.
So yes, I’m THRILLED to go to Jamaica! I’m also thrilled to take my three favorite beach vacay products. If you’re going anywhere sunny anytime soon, don’t leave without these:
La Prairie Soothing After Sun Mist for Face & Body: Let’s be honest, I plan to lay in the sun for four days straight. And I know my skin will be a hot, sun-sizzled mess afterwards. This spritz, loaded with botanicals, is a godsend — I mist it on everywhere (my skin, my body, even my hair) and immediately feel refreshed and toned. So glamorous.
Erno Laszlo Face & Body Protection SPF 30: I hate sunscreen — so pasty, so opaque, and ultimately drying. This one’s loaded with shea butter and vitamin E to moisturize (seriously, feels like a luscious body lotion), while green tea extracts and antioxidants help soothe and shield skin from damaging rays. Nourishing but not greasy — you won’t break out.
Redken Color Extend After Sun Shampoo: I’m blonde. Some highlights are damned near platinum. The sun will attempt to destroy this, turning my color brassy and busted, but I won’t let it! This shampoo is a must — it removes saltwater, chlorine and minerals that sit on strands and cause it to oxidize. Love, plus it smells like the beach.
Talk to you when I get back!