Everyone has a Fairy Beauty Godmommy. Tia’s is Iman — and mine is, well, Tia. Thanks to Shake Your Beauty, I spent my entire 23rd year rocking Revlon’s Raisin Glaze, and invested in satin pillow cases when she advised that it might be less than sexy to sleep in a scarf with my new boyfriend. I listen to all her advice.
Almost all of it.
In a 2012 post, she cautioned against wearing lace front wigs and heavy lashes if you’re not on tour or on the red carpet. But see, I’m going to the Dominican Republic for eight days of sexy sunning with my not-so-new-anymore-boo. I’m also transitioning to natural. So there’s no way I’m hitting the beach without faux hair help. I usually get a SVW — i.e., a Special Vacation Weave. I even name them (my favorite is Bianca, a shoulder-length straight ‘do that looked so real I got confused about which parts were my real hair). But this time I decided to do a full-closure lace front. No, I never considered that I might look like Wendy Williams. It’s a mess. I’m scalp-less and rocking a fake hairline. Now I notice chicks with bad lace fronts and wonder how did that happen to you, hon? I want to compile their stories and, like, do an expose. “When Bad Weaves Destroy Cute Girls.” But whatever, at least my delicate transitioning hair will be protected from the super-drying salt water and 90 degree sun. And I’ll just hide it with a straw fedora.
Since my hair situation will be a tad sketch, my makeup game has to be flawless! My go-to beach beauty essential is Bobbi Brown Coral Cabana lipgloss. It’s the prettiest orange-y pink sheer shade…and it lasts for hours. Hours! It practically binds to my lips. Plus, it makes me look glowy, tan and breezily sexy. A tropical vacation non-negotiable. Every time I reach for it, I thank Tia for introducing me to lipgloss — and I remember that life’s too short to learn all the lessons on your own. Sometimes you just have to heed the warnings.