Posts written by: twilliams

Prada Perfume is Magically Slimming

Prada Perfume is Magically Slimming

Prada-Infusion-dIris_50ml_EdP-700x700
So I’ve gotten… thick? Whatever. Chubby. Let’s just call this what it is. I’m officially a pretty, chubby girl. I didn’t even realize how much until this: I was zipping up my high-waisted jeans for the umpteenth time that day, and finally realized that it wasn’t falling on its own. My tummy was pushing it down. Ugh! Later that day, my new favorite club banger came on the radio, T-Pain’s “Up Down,” (sidenote: Love that he’s back. You must get into his “Can’t Believe It” remix with Justin Timberlake!). My ears perked up at the howlingly ratchet — but admittedly evocative — line, “Shorty thick like a Snickers.” I envisioned a luscious beauty with body for days, like a plus size supermodel. Like Tocarra. Sadly, I didn’t picture me. I felt like more of a Whoopee Pie than a Snickers.
 
Toccara-Essence-Magazine-570x380

Cut to me telling my bestie my plans to hit the gym, eat salmon salads and perfect Beyonce choreo in my living room. That has to count as cardio, right?
 
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But oddly, my bestie told me I was starting to look thinner already. Lighter. My boyfriend echoed this, saying “There’s just something thinner about you.” It took me a sec to figure it out — but it was my new perfume, PRADA Infusion’d Iris. It’s a skinny fragrance! The zingy, baby-powderish, citrusy floral is so feather-light and airy — that it makes you look light and airy. Which somehow motivates me to work out and eat healthier! I swear, I am all about this aroma-trickery. Ladies, I am nobody’s Whoopee Pie. I am #ThickLikeASnickers in my Prada, and proud!
xo,
LaToya L.
The Brow Tint of Life

The Brow Tint of Life

Ava and her brows.

Ava and her brows.

I usually do my own brows (insomniac tweezing should be considered a treatable medical condition). I’m pretty good at it, so I never needed profesh attention. But I was chatting with a famous brow technician friend at a recent event, and…well, she sort of read my arches. This is our relationship. We’re lovingly catty. Last time I saw her, I called her way-too-baggy jeans “ex-boyfriend jeans.”

Famous Technician: Even though your brows are full, they’re feathery. Sort of sparse. So they can seem vague. Ever tried a brow tint? It’ll fill in all the spaces, giving you a bolder, more Ava Gardner sort of look.

Me: You’re so manipulative. You knew that if you mentioned Ava Gardner, I’d have to try it.

The Famous Technician was going on tour with a pop star for a month, so I booked a tint appointment at Lower Manhattan’s esteemed Boom Boom Brow Bar. It’s the cutest place. The inside of it looks like the boudoir of a 1950s showgirl (there’s actually a chandelier strewn with brightly colored bras).

boom boom brow bar

 

boom boom

I sat down with the owner, a curvy Long Island Italian bombshell named Malynda. She broke the whole process down for me, saying, “First of all, you need to stop tweezing. The reason you’re constantly plucking is because you have every hair on a different growth pattern, so they’re coming in at different times. If you wax every month at the same time, they’ll all be on the same cycle. You’ll have two week of clean brows, and one week where they’re growing in. Lightly.” I never thought about this!

“And a vegetable dye tint is perfect for someone like you, a mom with a busy career,” she continued. “Because, with no pencils or gels or filling-in, your arches will look perfect every day. Like you’ve had a makeup artist groom them every morning! And it fades away naturally, in a month or so.”

I was sold. The dye part was weird…

dye

Here I am, letting the dye sit for ten minutes. I was terrified that, after she wiped it off, the shade would still be this dark. Cara Delevingne is hot, but I’m not her.

Guys, the results were truly stunning. I had no reason to be afraid. See:

tia williams brows

The top pic was my natural brow. All unformed and, yes, VAGUE. The second pic was right after she washed off the dye. It was still a little strong; hadn’t settled yet. The last pic was an hour later. Snatched.

I’m such a dork for living my entire life without proper, professional brow maintenance. And now I will be tinting once a month. What I’m not going to do is a my mustache, which she was quite vocal about aching to remove (you can barely see it, goddamn!). If you want to try the look at home first, I’d suggest Perfekt Beauty Brow Perfection Gel, a smudge-resistant tinted gel that comes in mascara form. It fills-in so prettily, and doesn’t look weirdly artificial like other brow tints. Get into it!

xo,

Yo Mama

 

Sketchy Lace Front, Sexy Lip Gloss

Sketchy Lace Front, Sexy Lip Gloss

Products6725-700x700-173383Everyone has a Fairy Beauty Godmommy. Tia’s is Iman — and mine is, well, Tia. Thanks to Shake Your Beauty, I spent my entire 23rd year rocking Revlon’s Raisin Glaze, and invested in satin pillow cases when she advised that it might be less than sexy to sleep in a scarf with my new boyfriend. I listen to all her advice.

Almost all of it.

In a 2012 post, she cautioned against wearing lace front wigs and heavy lashes if you’re not on tour or on the red carpet. But see, I’m going to the Dominican Republic for eight days of sexy sunning with my not-so-new-anymore-boo. I’m also transitioning to natural. So there’s no way I’m hitting the beach without faux hair help. I usually get a SVW — i.e., a Special Vacation Weave. I even name them (my favorite is Bianca, a shoulder-length straight ‘do that looked so real I got confused about which parts were my real hair). But this time I decided to do a full-closure lace front. No, I never considered that I might look like Wendy Williams. It’s a mess. I’m scalp-less and rocking a fake hairline. Now I notice chicks with bad lace fronts and wonder how did that happen to you, hon? I want to compile their stories and, like, do an expose. “When Bad Weaves Destroy Cute Girls.” But whatever, at least my delicate transitioning hair will be protected from the super-drying salt water and 90 degree sun. And I’ll just hide it with a straw fedora.

#NoScalp #NoHairline

#NoScalp #NoHairline #NoShade

Since my hair situation will be a tad sketch, my makeup game has to be flawless! My go-to beach beauty essential is Bobbi Brown Coral Cabana lipgloss. It’s the prettiest orange-y pink sheer shade…and it lasts for hours. Hours! It practically binds to my lips. Plus, it makes me look glowy, tan and breezily sexy. A tropical vacation non-negotiable. Every time I reach for it, I thank Tia for introducing me to lipgloss — and I remember that life’s too short to learn all the lessons on your own. Sometimes you just have to heed the warnings.

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xo,

LaToya L.